This page was originally created in order help those people who have been victimized by flamers who really have nothing better to do with their lives. Some people get a lot of flames and yet do not know how or are too "kind" to respond to their flamers. Other people get harassed and have no idea how to stop these harassments.

Today this Underground Lab has become a battle ground for those who want to air out their grievances. It became a sort of newsletter (which is why when we revamp, lay-out of old issues are preserved, just like old issues of newspapers). It remains to be an underground laboratory which only the people involved (the flamed and the flamers) are aware of, and no amount of advertising could ever come from us. However, we are not against other people linking this site to theirs. In fact, we believe that linking is a way some people would like to show their appreciation.

Now comes the question: What do we do and what are we really about?

1. We never flame first
   Please avoid coming here and saying we flame people just because we love flaming people or flaming for the sake of the act in itself. Negative mails are created here because somebody else started a "war" of sorts. We never start anything. We continue what is started.
2. We post flame battles as requested
   This is to teach some people a lesson. Since flamers who begin flame wars apparently crave so much attention, we will make them happy by giving them the attention they so covet. Thus, the recipients of flames request that we put up the mails they receive for all and sundry to see. Of course, we cannot help but make analyses of the flames in order to make the battles all the more exciting. People can call us the War NewsGroup.
3. As much as possible we refrain from swearing
   If flamers say we swear a lot, then those flamers again do not know how to read. Catalona may be one of those people who could not help herself from swearing, but she still avoids this sort of language as much as possible. We do not believe that excessive swearing can amount to anything, so please refrain from wasting precious brain cells in saying that we love swearing at other people for the fun of it. We detest having to stoop down to the level of brainless flamers when we can flame with class.
4. We are not about anime or manga...and definitely not about mythology
   This mistake is really funny. A lot of people think that we are making something -- a shrine of sorts -- for anime, manga, or spouting drivel about mythology. It just so happens that people who request for our help are anime lovers. That doesn't mean that our purpose is to glorify anime or manga. A little lesson in logic would probably help people avoid this mistake. As for mythology, we only use names we have either created or coined from different mythologies of Greek, Celtic or Filipino origin. We have never retold or made shrines for mythological characters. So please avoid saying that we messed up mythology because aside from the names, there is nothing about mythology on this site. Mistakes mentioned in this number often happen when someone doesn't know how to read or comprehend what is read. Please learn simple analysis before flaming us, that is the key to a more effective flame.
5. We are not peacemakers
   For those who think we are proclaiming to be peacemakers or "defenders of the defenseless" read this site again and again. We never said we were peacemakers, in fact, our purpose is quite to the contrary. If we were peacemakers we'd tell people to ignore flames -- which we do sometimes when the flames battle look ridiculous enough. Sorry to disappoint, but we're out to have fun and make fun of flames. We do not defend flames victims, we post flames battles to show how ignorant a lot of flamers can be and to let people show how much more intelligent they can respond to flames. So those who do not know how to read again, please highlight this paragraph.
6. We avoid posting in guestbooks or any public message boards
   After that one time that a new member of our Investigative Unit posted in the SMZone Forum, there has been a discussion among the Witches and we decided not to let anything like that happen again. First of all, we think that we should be careful with the footprints we leave. Second of all, posting on public signature places could most probably lead us to some sort of political discussions, which we try to avoid. We try not to let our biases show because they could affect our visitors' judgment against other people or beliefs. If anyone posts in any sort of public domain representing the Witches5, rest assured that that person has no connection to this Laboratory.
7. We do not tolerate using the "age excuse"
   A lot of our flamers ask: How old are you kids anyway? Not that it matters, but the oldest member of the Witches5 was born in 1953 and the youngest was born 1977. There are no Witches below 18 -- this is a rule -- and most of the Visible Witches are either in their mid 20's and early 30's. However, young as we are, we never tolerate using the old "I'm only 12!" excuse for misbehavior.
8. We do not practice witchcraft
   This mistake is particularly hilarious. One guestbook flamer thought that we were practicing witchcraft and signed our guestbook (that is entry #39) saying witchcraft is something that is believed only by those who have no life (or something to that effect). Well, he had been thoroughly humiliated anyway. That's what people get for flaming before reading the contents of the recipients' site and we hope that you do not end up like this person.

Well, so far those are the only clarifications that we need to put up here. There will be additions when the Witches5 meet more people who make the mistake of flaming us without first reading the contents of this site.

One final word from Mercutio (this time): Is someone harassing you, flaming you? Ripping you off? Write to us and we will check it out, give as much details as possible. We will only take action after investigation of your complaint, and providing we believe your complaint to be valid. Don't ask us to flame people just because you don't like them, we'd probably end up flaming you!